Monday, March 24, 2014

the world is fucking nuts

you cant have sex ed, you cant have condoms, you cant have birth control, you cant have abortions, you cant have child care.

but boner pills for everyone!

fucking nutjobs

Saturday, March 22, 2014

calling all Simpletons/ ex- Simpletons

we are having a mascot vote and the polls are tied. so if you are a member, or used to be a member, come on by and give it a vote.

our mascot will be used in promotional ways, and/or our calendar pictures, and signatures. he will be the future face of Simpletons. there will be a girl too, but the guy needs to be picked first (and then HE will pick the girl)

so stop on by and check out the contestants :)

Mascot Contest Thread

Sunday, March 16, 2014

waa its over

but im glad i logged in at the end. was just in time ot catch the amazing party(orgy) in the middle of town

 ^ that me. in the lower left corner. lady dark elf :)

Saturday, March 15, 2014

Elder Scrolls Online- some tips and FAQs

 hello friends! you may know that i have been in the last several ESO beta tests, so i have gotten a pretty good feel of the game by now. alot of people seem to ask the same questions in every beta, so im going to answer some of them here. if anyone has any further question,s let me know and ill answer as best i can! im no expert, but i have played all 3 factions and almost every race and class. so ive been around a little ;)

 first thing to always remember, explore. if you are a veteran of any elder scrolls game, this should come as a no brainer. but if you are from traditional mmos, this game might be a tad confusing to you. you WILL be rewarded for randomly exploring your environment. see that bookcase? it might have a skill book in it. every nightstand, cabinet, crate or barrel could have a useful item for you inside, so check everything. some rare items can ONLY be acquired this way, like new weapon style recipes.

 another benefit to exploring- treasure chests. you can find them anywhere, but usualy only in tucked away out of the way places, like this. this chest was not clearly visible from a small distance away, so dont be afraid to explore every nook and cranny. chests are the best way to get gear at lower levels before you have much money. they will also give you money. make sure you do a thorough job of exploring the crates and chests in the beginner tutorial level (coldharbour) to get alot of free lockpicks. out in the world, you will have to buy them. occasionally you can find one in a desk or nightstand tho.

 lockpicking. this one seems to confuse alot of people. but its very easy once you get the hang of it.
 move the lockpick over each pin. using the left mouse button, hold down the pin untill it starts to shake. let go of the button and it should lock in place. if you went to far, the pin will pop back up, just give it another shot. depending on the difficulty of the chest, you get a longer or shorter time bar. you must open all the pins before the time runs out. if you succeed, congratulations! the treasure is yours! treasure is not instanced- any chest you find out in the world is fair game to any player, so its first come first serve. this is a game of player skill, not character skill. the better YOU are at getting those pins down, the better chances you have of winning the treasure before someone else comes along and waits till you fail. i have gotten master level locks open with 1 or 2 picks before. it takes practice, and it can be quite fun.

 material nodes are similar to chests as in they are open to whoever loots them first. this is a jute flower. this is used to make cloth for light armor. (clothier skill) every character comes equipped with collection tools already, so if you see one just run up to it and activate the node. (E)

 this is what raw iron looks like. collect it just like the jute. iron is used for heavy armor and weapon making. (blacksmith skill) it takes a trained eye to spot them sometimes. like the chests, they can be tucked away in very out of the way places. look for mountains and rocky places, thats always a good place to try.

 this is maple. its always lying on the ground, so dont try looking for standing trees like in other games. maple is used for making staves and shields (woodworking skill)

 this is what the runes look like. they may be the easiest of the nodes to spot, as they kinda glow. you need 3 different types of runes to make a glyph, (enchanting skill) which can then be used to enchant your gear. you will need one square rune, one triangle-y looking rune, and one round. right click on any gear in your inventory to add a glyph to it.

there are also flowers and food stuffs you can collect for (alchemy skill) and (provisioner skill)
 i dont do those jobs so i dont have a picture, sorry. but flowers are around the world same as jute. food stuffs can be found in crates and barrels, and by killing some animals

 and these are just some battle shots. i was in first person for this one. my clanfear got in the way lol.

 this is 3rd person view. i prefer it, actually. i love first person in elderscrolls usualy but im just more comfortable mmo-ing this way.

 as you can see, enemies glow red when you get close to them.
many people have difficulty differentiating players form enemies, as there are no name tags. this is really the best way to tell. if it glows red, or has a red health bar, its an enemy. players have blue bars

crafting. ahh my favorite thing. the first thing you want to do with all those nodes you collected, is refine them.
as soon as you enter the crafting screen, you are in the refining tab now. (lots of people were confused about this before)
you need a stack of 10 harvestables to refine into crafting material.

after you have refined your raw material, you can begin crafting. the nest tab over should be the creation tab. make sure you have some race stones in your inventory. if you dont, you can buy them from the vendor
(each race can automatically make their own stlye of weapons/armor. you need recipe books to learn the other styles)

you can also break gear you have made or found, and research magic gear for its attributes. (this will break the item)
refining raw material or gear will sometimes give you random items that will help you improve existing gear. make sure you get a few of them. because improving something has a change to permanently break the item. the more items you have, the less chance of breakage.

well i think that is it for now. if you have any questions feel free to ask! 

Wednesday, March 12, 2014

space car!

i finaly got one! muahaha

i didnt know these things were so cool! i still have no idea how you are supposed to get one lol.
they can shoot lazers or go to space and create storms! and i can abduct other sims! teeHEE! i cant wait to try that.

there was an odd clone of my alien sim running around town, except she was a child. its possible i used a clone potion on her when she was a kid and i forgot about it.

well the clone was bugging me, so i added her to my household so i could master controll her into a different person.

well she had one of these bad boys in her pocket
mine NOW hahahaha

simmy bits

 took my now futuristic alien family to egypt.. MAN was it fun! the new tech makes it easy to get around. no more having to control shift teleport everywhere.

 i love them holopets :)

 Dillon blowing a dew bubble.

 went back to the future (lol) and found these! unicorn turds?

or leprechaun hidey hole? found a pot of gold. whoopee!

Monday, March 10, 2014

random nonsence

 my first plumbot! Mr Roboto.

 these holo pets are amazing! i want one for realz!

 Spooke got himself a ladybot. for companionship.

 and screw canes because being old and hovering is awesome

 Ladybot and ghost dog. such an odd combo

 been sims medievaling for a while now. determined to actually complete a game with better than bronze

 dont i even get a stick to bite on??

 i dont remember this knight but damn what a cool picture lol

 Queen Zeri of Malarky. she threw many a peasant to the pit.

 that wasnt a raisin...

 ahh this is the witch that you get to marry during that one quest. i didnt even really have to give her a makeover.

one of my wizards.

Thursday, March 6, 2014

it just figures

we have all had out problems with the sims patches or EPs, im no exception. but for the most part, i havent had too many major issues that hindered gameplay. each time a new ep or patch comes out, i dread installing it because, i usualy JUST got everything working fine and i dont want it to get messed up again.

well now that i have ALL of the eps, stuff packs, and patches, my game is so screwed up and i cant fix it.. and there is NOT going to be any new patch or pack to come along and balance it out again.

im totaly screwed! ITF really screwed up my game. i love it tho, im not getting rid of it. the plumbots are so cool!! the holo pets are super awesome! i could go on and on. ITF- not negotiable.  the bugs it came with however.... i really wish there was an exterminator lol.

*sigh* so i spent my whole game having very little glitches (except after ambitions and i think pets, those glitches were HUGE) and now that its all over, im left with one great big one. i havent even tried uni yet, im almost afraid to. its in there, but i havent gone yet.

ive tried store fixes, removing mods, all kinds of crap and nothing seems to work.

and there is no more Twallan now either :'(
is it sad im actualy hoping EA releases another patch? (not like they ever really fix anything)